The Problem of Choice.
This is one of the most fundamental and irresolvable problems in a
person’s life, in sense that there is no final resolution for this problem at
Our entire life and every moment of it is one or another choice
entailing the whole spectrum of other choices and so on to infinity. In fact,
when someone says "I have no choice…” - in that sentence there is no
humiliating acceptance and a real lack of choice, but decision (i.e. CHOICE) to
address this possibility to someone or something else.
Why is the choice itself, as a soul’s inner movement only then entails
both the mental decision and the action is one’s problem at all? Why individual
often has difficulties to choose?
Once I thought that such a difficulty is mostly inherent to people that
were born and brought up, like myself in a totalitarian society with extremely
limited and often altogether illusory choice - to people simply not accustomed
to such inner movements due to lack of skill. But having lived enough time in
the "free” society I am convinced that people limiting are themselves
(sometimes consciously, more often not) by a fairly narrow range of already
familiar feelings, facts, things and are not seeking to expand it. And if this
expansion nonetheless occurs, it is going on according to strong necessity and
The answer, laying close enough to surface, could be the fear and
reluctance of responsibility of one’s own choice, so the individual tends to
delegate their power (and choice) to someone or something else. It could be
anything you want – friends, lover, family, political party, government, public
opinion, advertising and so on. The essence remains the same.
But I think that the roots of this problem are going down much deeper.
They are stretching up to our very origin, to the very beginning.
If we are accepting the idea that
all and each of us is the part of God which is holographically reflecting
Creator in his WHOLENESS and that our very existence is God’s way of
SELF-DISCOVERING, then one of the most fundamental of God’s attributes –
INFINITE PERFECTION – is our attribute as well. And this underlined knowledge
of one’s inherent infinite perfection cannot be shaken by any circumstances
ever. Anyone subconsciously considers themselves PERFECT, no matter what is
occurring in one’s life. And the most important that one is absolutely right. And
I think that in this very place is rooted the Problem of Choice. Choice itself
means existence of uncertainty and the possibility that one of the preferences
being chosen would be "wrong”. Let’s awhile push aside that fact that there are
no "wrong” decisions and choices. The possibility of "mistake” itself feels on
deep emotional level absolutely illegal, because it creates strong conflict
with initial PERFECTION.
It seems that there is an insoluble contradiction here. And as younger the
Soul, that is, as it is closer from the original point of Separation from the
Whole and the less incarnations of Separation it experienced, so is stronger the
Soul’s memory of the ORIGINAL PERFECTION AND UNITY OF ALL POSSIBILITIES AND
PROBABILITIES. And the more tough and painful does the Soul experience such a
More experience (usually, quite difficult) gradually shifts the focus of
the Soul from PERFECTION to INFINITY. And then comes a new understanding of
PERFECTION which includes all infinite diversity of God (and therefore, Soul
itself). In this new understanding there are equal places for both "beautiful”
and "perfect”, "ugly” and "wrong”. Here we again begin to approach the ONENESS,
but seemingly from "another” side, enriched with all the gained experience. And
that is the purpose we are created for.
This new, expanded understanding of PERFECTION cannot resolve our main
problem. But it brings us different perspective and softens fundamental
contradiction, providing us, at first, mental and then emotional realization of
the fact that there is no conflict here at all. It allows us to make decisions
and to take responsibility more and more freely. Easily claiming power of our
own Divinity and less delegate it to others, because of fear of "mistake”.
The mental stage of this process is still painful and frightening, for
our distrustful emotions, in one way or another, affects us, creating anxious
and tense background. The second stage, including both the mental and the
emotional areas is an "aerobatics” Mastery. This is the feeling of Great Game
of Life in all its manifestations regardless how it may look. I think that for
such a Master it is not so easy to make a decisions and choices as well
because, first of all, he sees a far bigger picture and have to take into
consideration wider range of possibilities. But it certainly makes his life
And what would be better than interesting life?
© 2011 Ian Lisakov. All rights reserved.
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