Joy of Co-Creating

Something about Fairy Tales and “Magic Thinking”.

Ian — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 15:25:12 GMT

Something about Fairy Tales and "Magic Thinking”.

By Ian Lisakov

September, 2012.

Nothing ever happens instantly in our life. Any, even seemingly the most rapid or instant actions are still a process. And the most interesting things in our life are happening during this process.

It is true that for other people this process might be unnoticeable at all. There was a regular person with a regular life, acting in regular ways both for himself and for others, and "suddenly” he drops everything and turns to be something absolutely different. And it happens as in a Fairy Tale and "by a wave of a magic wand”. God knows how long he "sat” without movement and all at once he turns to be a "Hero” - or has been peaceful shepherd, paying his pipe, and suddenly grasped a sword and rushed somewhere to look for something. Most people who believe that everything happens exactly this way just do not realize that what they consider "the wave of a magic wand” of "instant turning” is, in fact, not the result, but the beginning of a big process that was preceded by another hidden process of preparation. Nobody ever becomes a Mighty Hero if he is weak by nature. Nobody leaves his sheep and pipe alone, if this business has not become deadly boring for him and he is not mature enough to change his pipe to something double-edged. The Hero must be ready from the inside for the next step. If the current state suits him, the magic will not come out.

But even the magic itself, in this case, means not a result, but a trigger to the new process from which the whole story begins. The tale starts to tell us not about the adventures of the Hero, which is only the uppermost layer of the story, but about the process (always quite a long and a hard one) of transformation of the character, for whom his previous life (as a result of certain inner evolution) has become impossible now. And by this process he is transforming into something absolutely new, something different. So we are speaking here about his transition into completely different level of consciousness and existence. Tales paints us the process of giving birth to the New Human Being. They describe the hard process of his passing by birth canal of his own internal changes, the birth of a New Self, which is ready for anything in order to exit into the New Life.

It is with himself that the Hero is fighting during the entire tale. It is his reflections to outside world that he is fighting with. This is his own inner self that tends to be content with "what it is”, the desire to take a path of least resistance rather than seek a higher purpose, reflects him the "enemy” trying to tempt him with "contentment” in order to prevent his further movement. This is his own self-doubt he meets in the faces of different obstacles emerging on his path. It is with her own fears that Beauty is fighting fright to take a close look on the Beast and see there something that could reflect her own certain part. Because she, on some level, doesn’t want this inner work and efforts, which will eventually allow her to pass through this ticket and to love that Beast on. And she could love it only after she will love the Beast within. And the final long-awaited kiss, magically transforms the Beast into handsome Prince, in fact, means the magical transformation of the Beauty into New Being, who loves herself unconditionally, and as such reveals her own true beauty.

But this is precisely the point. Happy ending of any fairy tale is hidden in its very beginning. It is in the Hero’s first impulse and in its aspiration and readiness to achieve the Purpose and cost, readiness to do all the necessary to realize this happy ending. And it means to bring himself into fit or adjustment with the state in which this happy ending could emerge from its potentiality to noticeable existence.

Another thing that often happens is that once he reaches his goal the Hero discovers that he has outgrown it already and feels the urge to move on, to the different shining Purpose, even more elusive. But this endless process, as usual, is beyond the frame of this particular and finite fairy tale, snatching for us quite a small piece of that infinite process and turning it into example, into typical behavior pattern to be creatively used for moving on.

Why do I say all of this? In order to somehow express and to describe the feeling which I see in myself and in many other people as well. This state of mind I’d called "The Magical Thinking”. This is the desire, the tendency to ignore this hidden process of one’s own transformations, leading to manifestation of the desired result. This is the desire to deny the necessity of this process. The desire to deny that fact that you have to conform to the outcome you want to receive, which is, of course, requires certain efforts and time in order to achieve.

How I wish I could manifest the desired outcome "by the wave of a magic wand”, easy and the most importantly, at once! How I wish we all suddenly took a leap into the 5^th dimension with Peace and Love all over Earth! But how could peace and love be all over the world if my own neighbors, or co-workers, or friends annoy me so much, and I’m not ready to accept their existence (or at least our co-existence) in this particulate space and time? How the abundance and wealth could pour down on me, if I am convinced that "… it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God” and so just aren’t ready to allow this abundance?

This is just a couple of the most obvious examples. There is nothing instantaneous in our 3D world and nothing ever happens "by the wave of a magic wand”. Every noticeable, tangible outcome has its own preceded process. The Teacher comes to us when we are ready to listen to him. Abundance comes when we are willing to accept it, and Love – when we are ready to love. And the outcome we have is always a tangible expression of our inner readiness to accept it. And the point is not the result itself, but the hidden process of endless inner changing. And the outcomes we have are only the milestones on this Path.

Ian

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Tunnel

Ian — Sun, 26 Aug 2012 16:32:15 GMT

Tunnel.
By Ian Lisakov
August 26, 2012

Sometimes, speaking with my Guides I'm asking them very personal questions and there is no possibility to predict the level of answer I will receive. It may be something very personal as well, it may be some picture with meaning yet to be discovered, or it may be something more global somehow connected to my question. This time I received not just an answer for my question, but a very interesting and a more expanded picture which I want to bring here as well.

Imagine a fairy rugged, mountainous terrain, covered with an enormous number of roads. Each or them with their own loops, ascends, descends, detours, bumps and, of course, with a straight and smooth sections as well. Some of them converging and intersecting from time to time, others so far away from each other that their intersection is hard to image at all, even theoretically. And every road belongs to a particular human being going or driving by.

These roads are not so simple. First of all these are one way roads only. Moreover, they resemble transporter's ribbon of moving stairway of subway. Even if you want to go back, against the direction of its movement and you'll try hard in order to do this, you'll find yourself being carried in the "right", forward direction, but in this case – backwards.

There is an incredible amount of very different roads, but there is something common with all of them as well. This is the waymark, which appears recently on each road. This waymark is the "TUNNEL". It is not obviously seen for everyone because of twists and turns of the roads. And those trying to move backwards don't see it at all. But it is definitely there.

All these roads, while remaining separate, somehow interdimensionaly converging towards this tunnel. There is not any possibility to avoid it. All of us, in one way or another, each separately and All At Once would have to pass through it. Some of those who are focused on their movement, or just like to look far ahead, out of curiosity, can see a dark arch of its Entrance with the red digit 12:12, burning up there. It's presumed that tunnel's Exit marks will be green digits 21:12 and, from that point all the roads will start to run in their own direction again. But it is still entirely ahead of us, and yet to be ascertained.

One of the main characteristics of this tunnel, apart from its inevitability, is its darkness. It's unlike the well-equipped, safe and lighted tunnels to which many people are used to. The only means of ensuring security in this tunnel is the inner calmness and focus, and the only light is Ones Own Inner Light. And it scares many people to cramps. Some of them are frightened in such a degree that are ready to do Everything just to avoid this passage, despite that the Only Possibility to avoid this experience is to jump into an even bigger Unknown. And they are jumping indeed, preferring not to go inside in order to nurture their own Light, because this process seems to them even scarier than obscurity and the darkness of the Tunnel. Others realize that they too tired; too exhausted that mere not able or have not time already to develop this Inner Light. So this jump is the only possibility for them indeed.

But all the rest in some way or another, consciously or unconsciously, with face forward or backwards, are heading to this tunnel. It is close enough already. There is almost no time and freedom to maneuver. It is better to fuss as less as possible and to focus on the main and essential thing which could help us to make this passage relatively easy and safe. And this is an essential thing, our own growth and our Inner Light. We have to find this Light within and clean as much shields screening this Light as we can. The purer will be these screens, the brighter this radiating inside out light will be and the lighted and easier will be transition through this tunnel.

Surely, there is always the possibility to pretend that there is nothing out there and to continue usual daily "vanity and vexation of spirit", or it is possible to move backwards as well. But then there is a danger that the Entrance of Tunnel will catch one off guard and in some rather awkward position – sideways or backwards, sadly staring into the past, to the moving away, relatively light spot of the Entrance. This state is hardly efficient, as well as urgent attempts to turn around in the darkness and to find the way gropingly. If this transition is inevitable it is better to prepare for it in advance.

We will obviously arrive somewhere. I believe that all of this deal is not as bad as we think it will be. I believe that this Arch with 21:12 digits really exists and really marks the Exit of the Tunnel and Entrance into the New Valley. At least, my Guides assure me of that. This is not the first such a passage in our history and not the last one. Our whole life and history is cyclical and "spiral". I also believe that this New Valley will be somehow smoother, friendlier and lighter than our current side. And I Know that even though our paths will diverge there again in all possible directions, None Of Us will remain The Same and this passage. And apparently this is The Purpose of this TUNNEL.

Ian

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© 2012 Ian Lisakov. All rights reserved.
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Note

Ian — Tue, 21 Aug 2012 08:16:03 GMT

Note.

By Ian Lisakov

August, 16, 2012.

There is much similarity between the beginning of symphonic concert and the Beginning of Creation. In the emptiness and silence of the scene, together with musicians appear single sounds. They gradually become denser and turn into initial chaos and cacophony. This chaos, however, potentially contains all the necessary elements for the future harmony and pregnant with something unknown, which, by the way, you might like and you might not.

Gradually increasing, this chaos reaches its maximum flooding the whole scene (and the Whole Creation as well). And at this point emerges a Someone, apparently possessing the ability to organize this chaos, or, at least, to pretend to fulfill this task. He rises his hands, separating himself from this chaos and attracting its attention, and all involved both on the scene and in the concert hall stop for a moment in anticipation and expectation. And then the New Creation begins and starts to unfold.

There could be a Big Bang in the beginning, or a quiet squeak. It might unfold rapidly or slowly and smoothly. The process could evolve harmonically, or there still will be chaotic tones eventually popping. All of this depends on the Original Plan and the performer's Mastery. But the initial chaos of the orchestra already contains all the development of this process and its perfection and imperfection.

And all of us, who are sitting in this concert hall, are coming to participate in this Creation (otherwise, why would we come here?). We're trying to fit it to ourselves. There are many of us here, in this place, and we are apparently and definitely forming some Unity called "The Public". But each one perceives what is going on stage in their own way and ONLY IN THEIR OWN WAY. The Creation rings for each one individually, and everyone participating in it on their own, comparing and correlating the sound playing by orchestra with one's inner tone. " I like it", "I don't like it", "I like it, but somehow not…", "This is rubbish…", "This is perfect harmony…" and the whole spectrum in between depends on congruence of these "outer" and "inner" tones.

The reason of our presence at this Concert has its parallels with our lives as well. First of all, no one pushed us to this space and time by force. All of us, in one way or another, come to this show voluntarily. Some of us moved by curiosity, some succumbed by influence of other people. Some people come because the desire to experience something new or to feel something long familiar again. And some people come with just the professional interest.

Likewise is our behavior as well. Some of us, being unable to find this harmony between the inner and the outer, blaming ourselves for coming and leaving the Hall, loudly and ostentatiously chapping by their chair, or quietly giving up, trying not to disturb anyone. Others using intellect or feelings (depends on personal inclinations) trying to understand what's creating disharmony there. Such people, working with it and, in one way or another, are moving and evolving along with the logic and the dynamic of this Symphony. They could eventually figure out where the reason of this dissonance is and either, finally enjoy the Symphony, or make conscious decision that this particular Symphony is "not for them". However, the work which has been done is never spent in vain. Third ones are chilly noticing the technical details of the performance and its correspondence to the Original Blueprint. And, finally, fourth ones, the happiest ones, are feeling their perfect harmony with what is going on and are simply having fun. So, you can just envy them and, seeing them as an example, continue to search for something as much in harmony with the sounds inside you and what will bring you such light and pure JOY.

Ian

Joyofcocreating.ucoz.com

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The Problem of Choice.

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 07:10:10 GMT

The Problem of Choice.

Ian Lisakov

This is one of the most fundamental and irresolvable problems in a person’s life, in sense that there is no final resolution for this problem at all.

Our entire life and every moment of it is one or another choice entailing the whole spectrum of other choices and so on to infinity. In fact, when someone says "I have no choice…” - in that sentence there is no humiliating acceptance and a real lack of choice, but decision (i.e. CHOICE) to address this possibility to someone or something else.

Why is the choice itself, as a soul’s inner movement only then entails both the mental decision and the action is one’s problem at all? Why individual often has difficulties to choose?

Once I thought that such a difficulty is mostly inherent to people that were born and brought up, like myself in a totalitarian society with extremely limited and often altogether illusory choice - to people simply not accustomed to such inner movements due to lack of skill. But having lived enough time in the "free” society I am convinced that people limiting are themselves (sometimes consciously, more often not) by a fairly narrow range of already familiar feelings, facts, things and are not seeking to expand it. And if this expansion nonetheless occurs, it is going on according to strong necessity and quite unwillingly.

The answer, laying close enough to surface, could be the fear and reluctance of responsibility of one’s own choice, so the individual tends to delegate their power (and choice) to someone or something else. It could be anything you want – friends, lover, family, political party, government, public opinion, advertising and so on. The essence remains the same.

But I think that the roots of this problem are going down much deeper. They are stretching up to our very origin, to the very beginning.

If we are accepting the idea that all and each of us is the part of God which is holographically reflecting Creator in his WHOLENESS and that our very existence is God’s way of SELF-DISCOVERING, then one of the most fundamental of God’s attributes – INFINITE PERFECTION – is our attribute as well. And this underlined knowledge of one’s inherent infinite perfection cannot be shaken by any circumstances ever. Anyone subconsciously considers themselves PERFECT, no matter what is occurring in one’s life. And the most important that one is absolutely right. And I think that in this very place is rooted the Problem of Choice. Choice itself means existence of uncertainty and the possibility that one of the preferences being chosen would be "wrong”. Let’s awhile push aside that fact that there are no "wrong” decisions and choices. The possibility of "mistake” itself feels on deep emotional level absolutely illegal, because it creates strong conflict with initial PERFECTION.

It seems that there is an insoluble contradiction here. And as younger the Soul, that is, as it is closer from the original point of Separation from the Whole and the less incarnations of Separation it experienced, so is stronger the Soul’s memory of the ORIGINAL PERFECTION AND UNITY OF ALL POSSIBILITIES AND PROBABILITIES. And the more tough and painful does the Soul experience such a conflict.

More experience (usually, quite difficult) gradually shifts the focus of the Soul from PERFECTION to INFINITY. And then comes a new understanding of PERFECTION which includes all infinite diversity of God (and therefore, Soul itself). In this new understanding there are equal places for both "beautiful” and "perfect”, "ugly” and "wrong”. Here we again begin to approach the ONENESS, but seemingly from "another” side, enriched with all the gained experience. And that is the purpose we are created for.

This new, expanded understanding of PERFECTION cannot resolve our main problem. But it brings us different perspective and softens fundamental contradiction, providing us, at first, mental and then emotional realization of the fact that there is no conflict here at all. It allows us to make decisions and to take responsibility more and more freely. Easily claiming power of our own Divinity and less delegate it to others, because of fear of "mistake”.

The mental stage of this process is still painful and frightening, for our distrustful emotions, in one way or another, affects us, creating anxious and tense background. The second stage, including both the mental and the emotional areas is an "aerobatics” Mastery. This is the feeling of Great Game of Life in all its manifestations regardless how it may look. I think that for such a Master it is not so easy to make a decisions and choices as well because, first of all, he sees a far bigger picture and have to take into consideration wider range of possibilities. But it certainly makes his life more interesting.

And what would be better than interesting life?

Ian Lisakov

April, 2012.

JoyOfCoCreating.ucoz.com

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"Memento Mori"

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 07:06:15 GMT

"Memento Mori"

Ian Lisakov

The most dramatic and outstanding event of every life is the death.

This subject has not been at the focus of my attention until one day this phrase come into my head in all its odd integrity. And it stuck there as a kind of definition. Since my own experience tells me that no thought comes without a reason, then I decided that this case is worthy of attention or, at least, some consideration.

And this thought was definitely worth consideration. If you'd think about it, you'd realize that the death is the only event that occurs really once in a lifetime. We are not speaking about those extremely rare cases, which are only confirming the general rule by their exclusivity.

Moreover, precisely because of its exclusivity, it is the only event which we are preparing for, our entire lives. And this preparation has shown us the full range of human ideas and emotions.

This range extends from the complete and careless optimism, which pushes death itself beyond the frames of consciousness to the realm of the deepest and hidden unconscious fears. In this case in everyday's life death simply is not being taken into consideration at all. A person lives and acts trying to avoid any reminders or thoughts about the death, like a student who enjoys freedom and carelessness during the semester and considers the coming exams as a distant and quite hypothetical threat.

On the other pole there is the conscious and rigorous preparation for death. In this case the whole life itself is falling out of the basket, because it is considered as an annoying delay before something much more interesting and enjoyable. For those life seems a tedious waiting in a lobby, in a company of non-familiar and stranger people before the start of a movie or a show, which is definitely bound to start, but when - God only knows.

The most important thing is that according to the channeling information and according to the records of the psychologists dealing with the regression into past lifetimes, both extreme points of the person's life are accompanied with the same feelings of others who surround this very person. These feelings just change their color from positive to negative and vice versa depending on where we are coming from and where we are going to.

In any case, person's departure from the one plane of existence brings to the ones that remain a feeling of deep sadness; and their arrival to another plane – the joy of a new meeting. In this manner, those feelings flip in the zero-points of our oscillation between embodied and subtle states during our countless incarnations.

But there is a little difference.

As I perceive it, our friends and loved ones seeing us off to this side of veil, feel the sadness of parting still comparable, to my mind, with the feeling that arise when you see off your loved one to the long and arduous journey. I would say – to a business trip. You are sorry. You still don't know when you'll meet again, because despite the fact that the term of an earthy incarnation is more or less known, you can, meanwhile, leave somewhere else as well. But, in any case, there is no irreparableness there. Anyway you will meet again, updated, more wise and experienced and it will be a great joy. You will have a lot to share with each other and a lot to remember. This knowledge and the absolute knowledge, not subjected by even a shadow of doubt, brightens, I think, this sadness and the pain of parting.

On earthy plane, in the realm of form it is different.

This is not my idea. It is certainly not a new one, but nevertheless it is true. While leaving the earthy plane of existence, everyone takes from here their Entire Complete Unique Universe that Will Never Ever Happen Again. Yes, the Soul will incarnate again and again. Yes, we'll meet there on the other side of the veil and will happily discuss these adventures with "friends" and with "enemies". Yes, we will likely meet the same Souls during other embodiments, because we apparently are working with the same wide, albeit limited circle of Souls. But we'll never meet with the SAME PERSON. Everything that is gone – is gone FOREVER.

The experience gained on Earth will be loaded into the treasury; will be written down into Akashi, added to Universal Database, anything you would want, and will remain available for future use. But on the earthy plane, just because of its uniqueness, this very experience will never be repeated. And the very event of death creates this uniqueness. Precisely in this very moment everything that a specific person did, thought and felt became absolutely UNIQUE and, therefore takes an immense value. That is why the moment of death is so important for all of us. That is why we are so afraid of it and prepare for it during our entire life.

Why am I saying all this? Because the grief felt by those remaining is not only legitimate and has a real basis, but not mitigated, in general, even by the knowledge of the future meeting "on the other side". I tell this all because the happiness of the new Soul's arrival is overshadowed always by underlying understanding that this new experience is transient as well. And I tell it because sometimes by the different reasons, sometimes simply be neglect and sometimes because of "ideological considerations" we do not appreciate or insufficiently appreciate such a UNIQUE UNIVERSAL EVENT as a HUMAN LIFE.

If you love someone – LOVE THEM NOW. Even if you'd meet this person in a next lifetime and would love them (it is possible that you'd become enemies?), you will not recognize them and your love will be DIFFERENT.

LOVE YOUR BELOVED NOW!

Ian Lisakov

November, 2011

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Question to Jeshua

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 07:00:50 GMT

Question to Jeshua

Received by Ian Lisakov

Everything written here has been received by integral package of awareness during the meditation. I just tried to write it down more or less coherently and consistently.

"Jeshua, you've been in our world, lived here. You have gone through what you have, although I think that we'll never know what really has been. If it's possible I'd like to talk to you and ask you some questions.

Why is there so little joy in our lives? Why, despite all inner work, cannot we reach abundance or at least welfare? Why cannot I live just as I want? There are many different "why”s, but all of them, in one way or another, involve overall scarcity of satisfaction which we feel in our lives."

Well, I'll try to give one answer for all that "why", for as you've rightly noticed, all of them are connected with and affected the same layer of issues. There are the issues inherent to those naming themselves "Lightworkes" or just considering themselves "spiritual" people.

It is important to understand that there are no "nonspiritual" people. The certain spiritual part inherent to all people incarnated in the world of duality and expressed by them in all diversity of the forms. This is trivial, but has to be mentioned in order to move to the essence of the question. Every individual in this particular incarnation is at a certain unique stage of formulation (i.e. shaping in form) their spiritual component.

Those still on the earlier stages are captured by the diversity of forms and spend their whole time either paying with the different forms and testing one or the other, or choosing a few of the most favorites and embodying in these forms an entire potential of the current life.

Such people are fascinated by the world of forms, its diversity, "realness" and tangibility and usually this is the only thing existing for them in this life. Everything that they cannot somehow "touch" seems irrelevant to them and pushed to the very backyard of consciousness, marked as not essential and, therefore, not worthy of attention, time and energy (that are essentially the same things). That, however, does not mean that these things have not been registered, noticed or have been ignored. They are just hidden, postponed "for the later".

Over the time (in the process of evolution) two things occur with the individual.

First, the game with the forms becomes more and more boring, as a diversity of toys becomes for a child, when they begin to resemble one another with time, without bringing any new experiences and sensations.

On the other hand, the mass of postponed impressions and questions becomes so big that simply ignoring it becomes impossible. And this moment of recognition the person passes through a complete overturn. Such a person switches their attention completely or almost completely away from the diversity of the physical, "tangible", and "matter" forms, (discarding them as something boring and, moreover, obstructing) over to all that’s "new" to them which had accumulated in their "closet".

All of you, who read these channelings now, who are trying somehow to live a spiritual life, make a spiritual work and consider themselves "Lightworkers" have undergone that stage throughout numerous lifetimes. These had been incarnations of a total or partial refusal of physical forms and attempts to bring order to accumulated spiritual baggage and bringing it to some form as well.

And since you are already tired from a variety of physical forms which ultimately haven't brought you satisfaction, you would now pour an entire spiritual content into a single, "true", rock-solid form. And for the establishing of that form for yourselves and for others you have been willing to give up everything, to fight, to kill and to die yourselves.

I'm talking about countless incarnations that are in one way or another connected to a particular religion - incarnations as monks, hermits, crusaders, theologists, Jesuits, ascetics, zealots etc., that exist in some form in any major religion. I'm not speaking here about those who live and flourish around the religion. These people more or less continue counting the toys of physical forms, just differently colored in such a case. I'm speaking about those who, during long-long ages, from incarnation to incarnation, rejected the physical, bodily life as unworthy for the sake of spirituality.

All these lifetimes which, indubitably, have advanced you greatly in your evolution, and ultimately have led to the current state of consciousness where you are able to overcome the restrictions of a particular tradition, no matter what it is, and to come closer to understanding and accepting the Unity, have raised in you, among other things, the qualities that are now beginning to hamper you.

I'm speaking about humility and self-denial which had been implanted in you for ages, the fear of highest (or just higher) authority, some spiritual arrogance and tendency to look down upon those still "having fun" physical forms and a contempt to these forms as something "lower".

Honesty speaking, you've felt yourself not so bad within the limits you consequently have pushed yourself into. You've got accustomed to be within this frame, settled there and have felt quite comfortable within all around determined world, where everything had been laid out on the shelves. And the most important thing is that you have no necessity to take responsibility of your own life because there was SOMEONE much higher, more intelligent, knowledgeable, and powerful who have taken this responsibility for you. During these incarnations you've forgotten how to deal with physical world of matter and, more importantly – enjoy it, because you used to condemn this joy and rejected it.

You have outgrown the frameworks of a specific system, realizing that they all belong to the Unity. Moreover, you are beginning to understand that the Unity includes yourselves along with all physical forms around you as well. You feel that there is no more space for us within familiar restrictions, but you are afraid to break through them. You know that there is a new task before you, but it does not cause you much enthusiasm, for you know that it involves exiting from your "comfort zone", whatever it have been, and the new territory exploration. You've been told that you’re able and need to gain your own power, but you are afraid for you know quite well that along with this power you'll have to take charge of your own life, without looking at the sometimes punishing, sometimes encouraging, but mainly always making a choice "Father".

Be aware of your fear. Realize where it comes from. There is no condemnation. You do not have to blame yourself and others. Yes, you have to learn a lot from the very beginning. And as in every learning process at the initial stage you will not be given just what you want. You haven't even got the confidence now to know what is right and what is wrong. But you will never gain it if you shall continue to look for authorities and hide from the world.

Please, remember. I've spoken to you once about the Islands. I know that it is scary to get up on water and go over it as a dry land, when over the ages you've been told that you can only walk on solid ground. This is not to mention that you can’t know if you even move in a right direction. But there is no other choice. The Promised Land does not exist. There is no perfect form for embodying your spiritual state once and forever. Not lastly because it constantly changes as well. There is only infinite approximation to an, in essence, unattainable perfection. Take also into an account that everything in your world could be known in comparison only. When you realize what is not suitable for you, you could know what you really need and by such a way become closer to it.

You've been told about bringing Heaven on Earth. This is not to imply a creation of the perfect society in which people will be only friends, brothers and sisters or something like that. Such a society could appear as a result. We are talking about a new level of mastering the physical form, about balancing the current disbalance; about embodiment of you entire accumulated spiritual experience into the physical form of YOUR OWN LIFE. Even though it sounds very strange for you. And only when you will master the art of balancing on that sharp edge of equilibrium, which is naturally not gained at once, could you feel confidence growing into you, accompanied with joy and satisfaction.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step"

Jeshua.

Ian Lisakov

October, 2011

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Stairway of Memory.

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 06:48:14 GMT

Stairway of Memory.

Ian Lisakov

This stairway is like a spiral down into a deep well. The deeper I dive down into the memory, the darker. The first several turns are yet well illuminated by today's light, but the deeper, the harder it is to make out something.

There are people who spend most of their life in twilight of this staircase, choosing a site for themselves in the relative distance from today's light and hiding there like in a bomb shelter. There is not very much light there, but safe, everything is known and familiar, snug even. The same faces, circumstances and lessons on the same painfully familiar frozen stage.

There are other ones as well, walking along the edge of this well, mostly with the head straight up and hardly looking at something beyond the horizon. It is absolutely apparent that such people just do not see or do not want to see what is under their feet. For those the irony is not only in the jeopardy of tripping and falling down. The funniest thing here is the fact that the upper area, which they consider as a temporary refuge, as just a step to further ascent, is actually an UPPER. It is always uppermost. Stairs never grow up, just stretch longer down, into the depth. And the top floor of today is the highest achievement for each of us for this very moment.

Striving to be aware of my life and to understand it I hope not to belong to any of these extreme groups, although, of course, I’m not free from both these sins as well.

Now, I'm standing on the top floor, looking into the depth without particular enthusiasm. Frankly speaking, I absolutely don't long to go down. Moreover, it requires from me certain efforts, I also don't know what I could see there. It will be nice, of course, to see something good, but the paradox is that it is not necessary for me to look for something good there. I feel that the upper floor of today is sometimes swinging, loosing it's stability under my feet, and I hear suspicious squeaks and, sometimes, even some kind of a thunder. There is simply no other choice for me. If I want TODAY to be the self-confident in my life and with what I'm doing, I have to go down into that cold depth and figure out what is squeaking and swinging there. I have to work well with these old pillars, probably replacing them with something more solid and reliable. By the way, it is not certain that it is dark and cold there. Last trip I stumbled on my own burning and it had been warm, even too much. You never know what kind of a trap you can fall into.

But this time I will not go at random. I know more or less where does my present experience feel uncertainty and with whom am I going to meet there in the darkness. I take with me the Torch of Intention to review more fixedly what I have to see, and a faithful friend and assistant the Observer – my own awareness. Without those two and this state of separation the whole thing is useless. Unconsciously sinking into feelings is simply senseless. Certain part of me has to remain aside in order to affect the process by changing it in way that will strengthen my Present and will forward it in a right direction.

I deepen lower and lower, passing by different places and circumstances. Someday, it will be time for them as well, if I'll feel that they are in my way. But now the light of my torch leads me in a particular place and to specific people. Well, here it is. Stop. The Observer with the Torch remains on a staircase to light my way and to get me out of there in time and I'm diving into a dark depth of past feelings and sensations. Break a leg!

"He was lying on the floor and the long beam of light from the window was falling on his face. He remembered how he arrived here and tumbled on the stone floor, face down. Despite the near-unconscious state, he'd felt it as very unpleasant and even somehow really bad. Committing one more effort he rolled onto his back and had fallen into darkness.

It was yesterday. Or maybe not… maybe sooner... When he started to crawl out of the yard to the church, it was Sunset. But now, according to the Sun battering into the high window, there day is bright again. Just nobody knows whether it is the next day, or a few had passed already. But it doesn't matter. Too many things did not matter anymore.

The floor was very cold, ragged and hard and he was lying uncomfortable and somehow awkwardly. The only warm place was his face, where the sunlight hit it, but it didn’t matter also, because he almost didn’t feel his body. While on the other hand, it was good, because along with the loss of sensation, he's lost the pain and weakness as well - everything that annoyed him so, recently. By the way, how long had it lasted at all? Probably, it was about a week. It depends on how long he has been lying this way.

A ray of sunlight brought him out of darkness and he felt that the slightly recovered body scraped the remains of power, but it was enough for wakening and memories only. Yes, it was about a week ago, when the long-smoldering fire of a controversy about what to do further, poured out in angry, nervous strife and confrontation. He remembered that. He remembered that he insisted to stay here and defend this place till the end. He shouted that this place had been conquered for HIM, belonged to HIM and that we had no right to refuse and simply leave it. But there were very few of his comrades that thought so. Honestly speaking, he had been the only one who openly supported this opinion. Most of them simply wanted to live and the abstract ideas had not been in their concern. In any case, that’s how he perceived their behavior then. This has been his fault. No, this was not a fault, but his SIN! He imagined that he is omniscient and is capable to decide what would be the best for everyone and what is most important – what would be the best for Him! It is his arrogance which caused such a storm of emotions and forced him to consider that detachments behavior as betrayal. It is his arrogance that forced him to forget the humility befitting his cloth, the ugly and stupid blaming, screaming and, finally, to seize the weapon, which had been quite undignified and foolish. But that moment he had been beside himself and only a retaliatory impact had stopped him.

When he woke, there was nobody next to him. Someone from his former comrades dragged him into the bed. His wounded leg was still bleeding. How many blood had he lost? He thought, a lot. Something was ringing in his head and he hadn't the strength for anything. The soldiers passed by, without even looking at him. It was not their concern. The detachment was preparing for departure. He felt himself beyond this efficient solidarity already. He withdrew himself from this solidarity and it rejected him now. After recent emotional burst of the resentment, anger and even rage, he felt ringing, chilly emptiness within. He had no power to prepare himself for departure too, and apparently, in was not necessary for this. They did not call him anywhere and seemingly were not going to. He could not believe that they would just leave him here, but something inside told him that it had been the solution, implicitly approved by most of them and that so it should be.

This thought began to raise resentment and anger within him again, but he had no power for these feelings anymore. The fuel of emotions was over and made way to the ability of sober analysis of his feelings and behavior. The outward vanity gradually disappeared from his attention field and his thoughts were focused on the recent controversy and his feelings regarding it. He thought about his entire life and his spiritual path which led him to that place. He'd remembered all the years of his ministry. He'd remembered both the humility and tolerance, which he tried to develop for himself and the bursts of his impatience, arrogance, anger and intolerance. Suddenly, he realized that he was never really obedient and tolerant, and that there is nothing here to be ashamed of. On the contrary, it is ridiculous and sinful to consider yourself a sinless and infallible angel in flesh, if even He was prone to anger.

When he realized it, he could suddenly easily forgive himself and allow himself all that hated in him before, all that he had unsuccessfully tried to erase. He had forgiven his former comrades for their attitude toward him and for their seeming betrayal of the most important thing as he conceived it. Moreover, he only now started to consider them as his real friends and this feeling was a rebirth of hope within him.

Either this hope or the lack of movement around him and unusual silence awakened him from his half-conscious state, in which he occasionally fell into during all this time, without stopping even for a moment to talk and argue with oneself.

There was no one around him. There had forgotten things everywhere and there was a silence. The only weak sound had seemingly come from the yard. He barely slid from the bed and tried to get up, but nothing came from this attempt. He did not feel his right leg. The leg was cold, swollen and he didn't even want to check it. Using his own sword as a crutch he somehow crawled down the hall to the yard, dragging his leg behind him as a piece of wood. The only things that he saw were the empty yard and the tail of the detachment far away that was seen through the wide opened gates. The hope, a usual, undying human hope has died within him this moment, and he had crumbled into the dust at the threshold, but he did not lose his consciousness. Something sank within him ultimately, but at the same time something important was released within. He had realized that he did not reach the place of his desire yet. Using his sword and the last power he had, he crept to the place he knew and loved most – the church. To meet with someone he loved the best of all.

And now he laid on his back on the stone floor of the church without feeling anything but the ray of light on his face and talking to Him, telling Him all that he had experienced during his life, and especially during the last few days. The world leaving him this very last week gradually ceased to exist at all. There was only this conversation and his thoughts. And then it was gone as well. And there was ONLY the LIGHT.

LIGHT – this is the key word! I see the torch burning on the stairs. There is nothing to do for me there anymore. I've done what I came to do. I've experienced it all over again, but this time accepted and forgiven everything I've rejected once. And most importantly, accepted and forgiven myself as I've been then. That is what was creaking and rumbling in that part of my stairs. I must hurry up atop, to the Sun, to the normal light and the fresh air of TODAY. The Torch of Intention cannot burn forever and I want to see the results of my today's work and do not wish to be stuck here, in the darkness.

Well, I'm here. How much better it is here than at the depth! And the top floor, according to my feeling, is much more stable and confident, at least at this point. It seems to me that I heard a squeak somewhere, when I've run upstairs. I should check the entire floor and determine, at least approximately, what has it been and where, and prepare for a new descend.

Ian Lisakov

July, 2011.

JoyOfCoCreating.ucoz.com

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ThetaHealing Session (The Experience of the Soul)

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 06:13:16 GMT

ThetaHealing Session (The Experience of the Soul)

Ian Lisakov

------------------

- Sit still, please. You prevent me from focusing. It would be better if you'd help me from within.

They have been sitting in their room. He's been sitting on a sofa with a pillow under his back and her – in front of him on the chair, holding his hands. He still could not calm down and relax. Something was precluding all the time. Either the nose would begin to itch, or the ear… He took a deep breath and tried to join her from within.

Suddenly, the room somehow receded into the background and he saw or maybe felt…

The square was not so wide. How big could a square of an apparently medieval town be, anyway? He stood on a huge pile of firewood tied to a pole. At his feet level he saw a dozen faceless heads. He could sense nothing from them, neither joy, nor sadness, not even curiosity. They've been there merely like some kind of a decoration, not unlike the barely visible grey walls of houses surrounded the square. The entire body was aching and the branches pierced his feet. But it didn’t matter, because his whole being has been flooded by a single feeling. This feeling compelled to shrink everything inside him, to veil his eyes (or maybe it was a smoke rising already?) and had made him paralyzed. It was FEAR. The fear of what would have to come in the next few minutes. Fear and realizing of inevitability of what had to come, impossibility to hide, run away, to do even something…

He saw the first flare and the loss of the last stupid, crazy hope had blasted his fear with even a stronger feeling. If the fear had been cold and chaining, this new one had been hot, burning and unbearable. It was impossible to keep it inside. It was torn from the soul and finally has burst out with crying. Whether it was loud or silent cry was unclear, but what was clear, is WHAT was said that moment. It was the cry of frustration and pain, addressed to the Highest which he firmly and sincerely believed in his entire life. A cry toward that highest meaning which he taught others by words and by example of his own life and which betrayed and left him now, discarding everything. What happened now denied all the faith, all the sincerity, all of his life devoted to this service, turning him into a candle on the sanctuary of his own. This last image overflowed the cup and spilled this feeling outside: "You betrayed me. I honestly believed in You. I served You all my life and now I have to be burned all the same in Thine Glory! So, it was a deception and I curse You and renounce You!"

At this very moment, with this understanding within, he returned back to the room, or almost returned. The feeling still possessed him and he spoke stutteringly only the very last sentence. The very essence of what had happened.

- It’s good! It explains a lot regarding you. Go back there. Try to do something. You can change it. Everything is connected. No matter what it actually had been. Go back, change your feelings and shut this hole. Change the most important – your attitude.

The same square again. And the same branches pierced his feet. He returned back to the same place and time. But this time he clearly understood that there is not a bit of hope. He tried not to allow the memory conquer him entirely and tried to keep connection with the room where his body had been sitting now.

It wasn’t possible to do something right now. He had to wait for that very moment, having gone through all the process again, but changing his perception, his attitude.

The same faceless heads watching him, FEAR and panic had grew within him. There was nothing that could be done. He had to die again, but this time it must be somehow different. He kept in his mind with all his force that second (or the first) one, who was staying in the room and waiting. Along with the highest wave of fear he saw the smoke start rising from the pile which he stood on and he realized that the next moment he will see the worst – the FIRE.

NOW! THE TIME HAS COME! "Lord! Whatever it will be, I BELIEVE! I believe that it should be so. I believe that it will bring something better, something that is not given to me to understand. I believe that You are here and did not abandon me, despite all my current terrible feelings. I believe in You not less than earlier and accept Your Will. I don’t hate these people. I don’t feel anything at all regarding them. There is nothing connected to them. What happens here, happens between You and me only. Whatever happens I will stay with You. But, Lord, Please, do something to make it faster. Please, DO ANYTHING…

What happened next had knocked him back, to the room, but he couldn’t say anything. He felt a huge lump in the throat, tears streamed from his eyes and he had been near the state of hysteria.

- Relax. Don't keep it within. Let it go. Release it. Would like some water?

- He nodded.

- More?

- Nod again.

Finally the throat become a little freed

- The Angel – he squeezed out.

- What is the Angel?

- The Angel descended in front of me and blocked EVERYTHING by its wings. It blocked the square, houses, heads, EVERYTHING. And the most important thing that it blocked was THE FIRE! I DIDN'T SEE THE FIRE!

These words brought him a new hysteria attack, but along with it also an awareness and an incredible relief. And riding the wave of this feeling he return back again, but not to the square this time.

He sat on a green grass top of a hill, surrounded by trees and bushes. His Angel was next to him and there were some additional figures on the same lawn. It was warm, there was no pain and an incredible stillness and silence was spilled in the air. There were no sounds there, because the sounds were not necessary, and the words as well. Everything was clear for everyone without any words. The city walls were visible at the some distance and a little bit lower. The whole picture was quite idyllic. Only far away, behind the houses a black smoke of his burning ascended straight into the sky.

Ian Lisakov

June 2011

JoyOfCoCreating.ucoz.com

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Islands. (The Experience of the Soul)

Ian — Sun, 22 Jul 2012 06:01:22 GMT

Islands. (The Experience of the Soul)

Ian Lisakov

There was no time. It has been something, rather - 4 or 5 PM, when the Sun doesn't go down yet, but not already broiling. Though, the Sun is never broiling here. It came to be that when creating this place I never cared about the weather, so it remains almost the same all the time.

The only radical shift had happened at the very beginning, when I haven't found my Guides within the familiar room with fireplace, but suddenly had seen the window and opened it. There was a night there, rather a very early morning, when the dawn is just breaking and it’s still dark out there. I remember the feeling of freshness, moisture and chillness outside and the sense of emptiness and abandonment from the empty chairs near the extinct fire.

When I've walked out to the park, there was light already and in the parkway stretching out from the house I've met myself near the bench. It was a more vivid, wise and seemingly slightly physically larger version of myself. We'd met in this place many times, for this has been the only place existing by that time in my park, but I'd not succeeded to build its exact image. These had been feelings and impressions mostly.

Later I'd started to create this place consciously or nearly consciously by adding another parkway, more places and, finally, a small bower. Place, where one day several, by that time wandering already on their own, versions of myself with different inclinations, have merged together in a rather intense vortex.

It is interesting that seemingly the things and the change have started happening according to their own laws over time and even after a while, I only have noticed and realized that every new appeared place, every addition has not simply been the extension of the already existed, but somehow really new. The old ones are left behind me and continued to exist for my disposal up to now, but I've never returned back. I'm leaving that places behind, in my memory and even though I know for sure that I always could return back and check what is going on there, in my Room, for instance, I'm moving away from that place, even physically and I don't want to go back and watch. There is nothing to do for me there.

This way I've reached the cliff. In fact, it was not quite a cliff, but just a hill with a narrow trail running down to the beach of the bay that was almost closed by a cape from its one side. It was a wonderful place. I don't think that I've created it completely by myself. Most likely I've seen something like that in a movie or a book in the past. But it didn’t matter. It was the place of my dreams - at least I perceived it as such, then. And I began to settle in it with a passion. I decided to build a house there. "And there was house. And I saw that it was good". This was the House of my dreams as well. There was even a hall with sliding glass wall (another dream) overlooking the garden. This hall has been designed so all my individual aspects could come together and discuss my own immediate problems. (It is interesting that the hall has been opened out to the garden, but not to the sea, i.e. backward).

It seems to me that we've never gathered there. But, in general, as I now understand, it is not surprising, taking into account our triumphal merging there, in the bower. There was a little boy only playing on the beach in the sand with a ship which I've given him. Moreover, it is odd, but I recalled now that there was no a personal space of mine. There wasn’t any room filled with my personal belongings. Entire house existed within me as a part of the MY OWN whole place which I gradually created and moved through, along with the First Room, left long ago, with the Park, the Parkway, the Bower and the Garden. It was expression and embodiment of the Ideal House, which, ultimately, did not become a Home at all. It may sound strange, but most of all I felt myself in my personal space in the kitchen combined with the gallery opened to the trail running down to the beach.

One moment I felt several things occurring simultaneously. First of all, I somehow stopped coming around the house, gradually shifting toward the beach. And secondly - I started to feel myself stuck like as in my outer life as well, but continued clinging to this place. After all, this was the "House of my dreams"! I built it myself and invested in this house so much! But the movement toward the sea was steady and continued relentlessly. I started to descend increasingly often by trail to the beach without entering the house until the beach began to be "my place". But I still felt it very close behind, which gave this entire picture some kind of stability and confidence.

But, suddenly, I noticed in the sea, which had never been in the focus of my attention, the Island. It was like a blow and at the same time a hope, as a promise of breaking out of stagnation, depressed me. All of my impulse to freedom, independence and longing for new possibilities has focused on this image. Beside myself, I rushed forward, running down to the beach toward the Island, flew up to the knees in water… and stopped.

Well, I've come running… and what now? Would I jump in to the water and start swimming, leaving everything behind, without understanding where to swim exactly? And even without being sure to reach somewhere at all? I wasn’t ready for this action.

I returned sadly back to the beach to think and analyze what had happened. The Island loomed at the sea all the time. Moreover, it seemed to me that I've seen behind it something else. But it was still an unknown, indefinite goal. I could not leave everything so simply and rush into the unknown, exactly like in my outer life I could not leave my quite boring and unsatisfying job without having before me something new and more or less definite. I've still taken refuge in the family needs, in the convenience of achieved status and mere in need of simple survival. Shortly speaking, I've decided to refrain from rashly steps prepare myself carefully. I decided to build a boat, take all my accumulated baggage with me, and then sail to the new, unknown shores.

What only people wouldn’t develop in order not to do anything.

In other words, I've taken these preparations very seriously. I repaired the pier, built the boat, which has gradually evolved into a pretty yacht, equipped and loaded it and even did a sails trial -and figured out that my bay is quiet and peaceful not without reason. There was no menace of expansion to the Island or Islands from my side, because the bay was blocked by the underwater reef and there was no passage for the yacht. Therefore, I was able to spin in this pool as long as I wanted, portraying myself explorer, while remaining on the same place, albeit safely.

But that was not what I wanted. Well, I cannot say that "the storm was my very burning desire". There is nothing wrong and bad with safety and solidity. But what I wanted was a Breakthrough, an Exit, Freedom, in other words - something fresh. But it was clear to me that there was a deadlock there and I didn’t see a way out of it.

And I retreated. I abandoned it. Ceased to make futile attempts and almost stopped to visit my place. I pushed that case into the database of my experience, as a thought, forever. But I was wrong. It's become clear that it is temporary only.

Meanwhile I started to deal with my other things and problems, but the unreached Island has been stuck as a splinter in my hand, reflecting on my external deadlock situation. Until one day I got to understanding that in order to escape from this situation I had to make something unusual, something not typical for me. In my case it was – to ask for help. It might be trifle for others, but not for me. It has always been easier for me to do something by my own and not to ask for help from other people. There could be a million fair external reasons for it, but, in any case, it has always been easier for me to deal with the problems and make my decisions only on my own.

And I called Him. Both believing and not believing that HE will answer me.

When I appeared there next time, He was there already, sitting on the stone at the end of the beach and waiting for me. He was in his ancient white robe and an auburn hair and beard.

- You look very classically – I said.

- But what would you expect? This is because you envisioned me in such way. I could look like anything. In fact I don't even know what I look like for you now. Classically, as you wish. It' doesn't matter to me. These are your limitations and your concern.

- You came to help me?

- Don’t you ask?

- Yes, of course, I just didn’t believe…

- Come on. You are not a child. Don't try to be more naïve than already you are. Especially with yourself. You are evolved enough in order to receive answers for your questions even before you'll express these question in words. And you know exactly that if we haven’t met up to now, it means you didn’t want this meeting.

- Yes. You are right. I know, sorry…

- There you start again! Don't ask for forgiveness. You know that this is inappropriate.

- Yes. I know. I hear Your answers within my head even before I formulate a question. Perhaps, in this case, there is no point in asking questions?

- On the contrary. It is impossible to receive an answer for an unasked question. Such a question will remain in the potential state. The Truth is that by asking only the REAL questions it is possible to receive an answer. That is the point, and the task, and the work, which have to be done.

- Okay. Let's return to my business.

- Come on. I know you story. You don’t have to utter it again.

- Well, how do I get to the Island?

He looked at me directly for the first time.

- GO! GET UP AND GO!

My heart sunk. This was what I've not expected. He looked at me and understood that very moment the whole range of emotions engulfing me.

- Well. I understand, than you think about the sea. I'll help you. Leave the sea alone and care not about it. You need not imagine the entire sea frozen or something like that. Imagine that you go from hummock to hummock and that they appear right under your foot. That is all you need to know. And now – GO!

He stood and looked straight on me.

- LEAVE ALL THAT YOU'VE GATHERED HERE. YOU NEED NONE OF THAT. TAKE ONLY YOURSELF AND GO! KNOW THAT NOT A SINGLE ISLAND IS WAITING FOR YOU, BUT A LOT OF THEM. BUT DO NOT WAIT AND DO NOT HOPE FOR SOMETHING MAGICAL! NONE OF THEM SHALL BECOME A PROMISED LAND, ALTHOUGH EACH OF THEM WILL BRING YOU SOMETHING, SOME EXPERIENCE AND ONLY YOU WILL CHOOSE TO TAKE IT OR NOT.

- AND NOW – GO!

And I took the hand of a little boy, who has been there all the time playing with the ship in the sand AND WE WENT. It was like a fresh ploughed field or very soft sand. It was not difficult. And the Island was not far from my shore. And on the Island we went to sleep directly on the sand. Apparently, a night had happened.

In the morning it became clear that on the Island there was nothing but sand and palm trees. Our beach was not far away, slightly hazy, but He was still there. On the other side we could see numerous different-sized islands, but we did not hurry anywhere. We still need to explore this one and see what it could bring us. We'd look around and then would move on. We passed through it once and we’ll do it again.

Ian Lisakov

May, 2011.

JoyOfCoCreating.ucoz.com

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